The Reality of Childhood Domestic Violence
“STOP! STOP! I won’t ever do it again! I’ll make good grades, I’ll be the best kid in class, I will pray my salah on time, and I will do everything you want me to do. Don’t get mad at her, it’s not her fault. PLEASE, I’m begging you!!!!”
These are the screams of a young 8-year-old girl, fighting for her mother as her father forces her to watch him beat her.
These pleas have become a ritual every time one of the kids makes a mistake, her father has a bad day at work, or his paternal aunt instigates fights between her parents. Not only does this little girl have to plea for him to stop, most times her father forces her and her 5 siblings to watch as he belligerently tries to choke her mother with the telephone cord, harm her, or verbally abuse her.
Childhood domestic violence (CDV) is a serious issue that affects millions of children worldwide. CDV occurs when a child witnesses or experiences physical, emotional, or sexual abuse within the home. CDV can have long-term and devastating effects on children's physical, emotional, and social development.
Children who grow up in homes with domestic violence are at higher risk of developing mental health problems such as depression, anxiety, and post-traumatic stress disorder. They may also have difficulty with emotional regulation, aggression, and interpersonal relationships.
We may believe that these children are better off in nuclear households, where they have both their father and mother together bound by marriage. Of course that is the ideal, and is the best option for any child to flourish emotionally and physically. However, holding on to toxic and abusive relationships where children are watching or experiencing the trauma of abuse is more detrimental to their long-term mental and physical well-being. A broken family isn’t necessarily a single-family home, a broken home is one where children are witnessing daily abusive and toxic behaviors.
A home where a child experiences love, affection, and respect is the biggest indicator of success in the long run. Ultimately a loving home is one where toxicity isn’t present and love supersedes it all.
